Can Your Friend Officiate Your Wedding? Know the Facts

In today's world, couples are taking charge ofsay they are legal in all states (regarding
their wedding ceremony. Religiosity is shrinking andsolemnizing weddings) or that they can customize
many couples are looking outside of the church ora package for each state, beware. For example:
synagogue to find a wedding officiant. Couples areVirginia will not authorize clergy to perform
saving money while making their ceremony moreweddings unless the clergy member has an active
meaningful by asking a family member or goodministry and a congregation. Simply obtaining an
friend to officiate their wedding ceremony. I'm notonline ordination certificate will not fly in Virginia.
here to decide if that is right or wrong. However,Other states that have similar requirements
when it comes to who can solemnize a marriage,include New York City, Connecticut, and Alabama.
it is important to know the facts.Las Vegas requires ministers to have an active
If you are thinking about performing a wedding,congregation while some states will accept online
remember that you are facilitating a legal contractcertificates as long as they are accompanied by
between the couple. It is your responsibility toan authorization letter from the organization
make sure that you adhere to the requirementswhere you obtain your certificate. Do your
and laws of the state in which you are going tohomework and call the county clerk.
perform the ceremony. In many states, any5 - Make sure your beliefs are in alignment with
ordained clergy can solemnize a wedding. As such,the organization through which you obtain your
it is easy to go through any of the many onlinecertificate. Are they interfaith in nature, Christian,
churches and seminaries to obtain an ordinationdogmatic or secular? Which organization feels right
certificate. But, is it legal?to you? Remember, you will be in their data base,
How do you find out if it is legal? Don't rely onso be careful who you choose.
information that you obtain online as offered by6 - Are there hidden costs - such as, they will
online ordination services. They may or may notsend you a letter of authenticity, but for an extra
be accurate. Go to the source and call the clerk incharge?
the county in which you wish to perform the7. No church can give you authority "from the
service. Ask them what the requirements are forstate" to perform a ceremony. If they say that
an ordained clergy to solemnize marriages withinthey can grant state authority, beware. They can
their county. Done.authorize you through their organization, but the
If you find out that it is legal to perform a servicestate is a separate issue.
if you are an ordained minister, then pick an online8. Look for a simple site that is not cluttered with
organization that you feel is valid. The followingso much information that you get sidetracked into
are pointers to help you determine the validity ofordering something that you cannot use due to
any specific organization.misinterpretation.
1 - Exclude organizations that advise you to getOnce you have made it through the hoops -- (1)
ordained first and find out the laws later. Whyreviewed the laws (2) ordered and received your
would you purchase something before you knewcertificate (3) registered with the county (if
if you could use it?required), you can perform the ceremony. Most
2 - See if the organization has a contact numbercounties issue three copies of the marriage
and call it. If someone picks up the phone and islicense--one for your records, one for the couples
willing to talk to you, then you can feel goodrecords and one to send back to the county. If
about the organization.the county does not issue three copies, make
3 - Ask if the organization has a physical address.two xerox copies--one for your records and one
While it is not necessary to have one to be afor the couple to keep.
legal entity, it indicates further authenticity of theIf you do perform a wedding ceremony for a
organization.friend or family member, know that you have
4 - Make sure they are upfront about the lawsbeen honored to minister in this way. You will be
regarding solemnizing marriages by state. If theyremembered in this way for a long, long time.