Three Ways to Find Hope After Loss

Have you lost someone so special you feel youyour specific loss, lighting a candle with your loss in
can never be happy again? I ask this questionmind, having a cry. Also, try writing your longings
because sooner or later we will all be hit with ain a private journal; your expressed feelings are
loss we think we cannot bear. No one escapes it.crucial to making it through your dark night of the
Consider the recent death of Senator Tedsoul. Consider doing something for someone else
Kennedy. During his life he looked grief andlike bringing an elderly relative or neighbor a pot of
personal tragedy in the eye many times. Thesoup or a delicious treat. Maybe take a lonelier
Senator, as other giants before him, will beperson to church, temple or synagogue. And if
missed. His family, as all families, will have to wrapyou have children or grandchildren ... oh, the joy to
themselves around their monumental loss, clinghug them. If you have a mate or a friend ... turn
together, and go forward. They and we knowtoward them, not against them.
that no one can ever take the place of theThird, pray for the grace and courage to accept
beloved deceased person.your now life. You will probably go through the
As humans, we wonder if we can everstages of grief and loss (Denial, Anger, Bargaining,
overcome the pain and loss we feel. We doubtDepression, and Acceptance) more than once, but
we can go on and find hope again. But we canremember to reflect more on your many present
and these are my suggestions to help.blessings and less so on your past sorrows. I
First, make the decision to live which means youknow it's hard but you can do it, you really can.
get out of bed every day and put your feetDear Friends, there is an appointed time for
down on the floor. Your life is a gift even if youeverything and we must surrender to it. "A time
don't feel that way right now. Be grateful forfor every purpose under the heavens. A time to
your life, even the sad parts, for pain opens thebe born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a
heart more fully. Also, others who love andtime to uproot the plant...a time to heal...A time to
depend on you need you there physically,weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a
emotionally and spiritually.time to dance." (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4)
Second, allow yourself time to grieve your lossYes, there is a time to hope again and this is the
every day - not every single moment, mind you -time, the time to Make Every Day Matter.
but actively by taking a walk and meditating on